An astrologer recommends the finest soup for your sign.

Aries

Aries controls the head, and tortellini pasta resembles an ugly top hat. Add that the planet of conflict rules this cardinal fire sign, making it desire to be first, best, and correct. Thus, for ages, Bologna and Modena have claimed to have invented and refined this dish.

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Taurus

Taurus represents carnal and caloric desires. According to poet Robert Crawford, potato soup is “that's so thick you could shake its hand and stroll with it before dinner.” Dignified Taureans eating with their in-laws may order a Vichyssoise, yet every

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Gemini

Gemini, a fluid air sign, may adapt, form shift, upend, and contradict facts. Literary and storytelling enthusiasts thrive on debate. This suggests that twins would empathize with the passionately (get it?)

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Cancer

Cancer is most connected to roots, family, and nurture. The most common ‘get well soon’ gesture is chicken noodle soup. The moon-ruled Cancer is the most emotional sign in the zodiac, so it seems sense that their soup inspired the “Chicken Soup for the Soul” book series.

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Leo

Andy Warhol screen printed the Campbell's Soup can into notoriety, demonstrating the gravitational pull of lions and spotlights. Its initial soup was tomato, which is reflected in the can's color scheme, which, like a Leo, is hard to miss.

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Virgo

Virgos regulate the stomach and are as good at caregiving, soothsaying, and curing as Cancerians. Wontons in wonton soup were thought to contain medicinal herbs and plants during China's tang dynasty to provide hot, tasty cure.

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Libra

The idealistic scales of balance and harmony represent Libra, which oversees the seventh house of relationships, including marriage. Wedding soup, which may be more Spanish than Italian and was not served at wedding festivities, is termed for the symphonic, more stable combination of meat, broth, and vegetable.

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Scorpio

If the zodiac were a vegetable garden, Scorpio, hidden genitalia rulers would be the multi-layered, aphrodisiacal onion. It takes time, loyalty tests, and therapy/necromancy to get inside a scorpion. Carmelizing onions for this rich, black, curative soup requires patience and time.

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Sagittarius

Sopa Azteca, or tortilla soup, from Mexico teaches resourcefulness and optimism, two Sagittarius traits. Stale tortillas are revived and fried in this soup with dry chilies, symbolizing this sign's mercurial fire. The experimental, mind-altering Sag's runner-up is marijuana matzo ball soup.

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Capricorn

Scarcity, dad vibes, superiority issues, and inherited teachings define Capricorn. Buddhist monks brought miso to the Japanese 1300 years ago, and it was used as money and only the affluent and honorable could eat it. Spoons up, pinkies out.

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Aquarius

Aquarius, ruled by Saturn and Uranus, bridges the conventional and the unconventional. Water bearers associate themselves with space exploration and invention, seeing themselves in Campbell's cream of mushroom soup, an almost indestructible foodstuff that hardly resembles mushrooms.

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Pisces

Pisces, the zodiac's poet, is ruled by Neptune and favors feeling over reason. In “The Ceremony of Giving,” a crowdsourced poem that dreamily blurs mothers, moons, matzo balls, and what we make with what we are made of, soup has never been more beautifully turned into verse:

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